Reasons why I might not be the right fit for "relationships"

Relationships have become common. Be it casual, or even the steady long term ones, you will have one or you had one, at some point in your life.

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Hello guys, I know I am late this time. But, your girl is in 'corporate' now. 😁

#campusplacementsuccessful

I was busy with that.

In this section, I'll talk about something more irrelevant 😂, about #relationships.

Let us look at the reasons why I might not be the right fit for 'relationships' (and feed to my anxiety! Yay! Jk. I just wanted to be myself).

Disclaimer: Not trying to blame or anything about anyone here. This is just my observations, listed casually. I am not gonna talk about my toxic traits (that might be there) but here is a genuine list of thoughts that I find difficult for people to accept about me.

♥ I believe in love. However, I believe in friendship more. ♥

If I lose you as a friend, I will probably lose you as my 'boyfriend' as well, sooner or later. Friendship is the building block for any kind of relationship. Friendship brings respect, and that leads to love. That is how I perceive it. And, not everyone out there is accepting of such ideology.

♥ I normally cry a lot ♥

I cry a lot. It is my normal. If I am angry, I'll shed tears. If I am sad I will get a fever/headache until I breakdown.

It is the way my body copes with change. I am not alien but I understand that this can be quite scary when you fall for me. However, I wish people would understand that it is a way for me to ensure that I don't get overloaded inside. And crying is a lot better than hiding away and being resentful.

♥I do not handle criticism from my love very well♥

Criticism from anyone, I know how to distinguish and categorise between what to accept and what to let slide but, from the person I love? Um...

This one is a bit tricky. I am not saying you can't tell me where I went wrong in a conversation. However, if the criticism is about my usual behaviour and general characteristics, I probably won't know what to do. I can't fix my decade full of learning in a day.

Another thing is people generally find me nice, kind and sweet, in the initial stages and later realise I have other things as well (I realised this by looking at patterns of my friendships and their grievances).

Well tbh, I didn't change. I happen to have characteristics other than kindness. That doesn't mean I stopped being kind. I am not very quick to change. If you find me changed, there is a solid foundation and it will be most probably, positive. If it is negative, believe me, it is probably me throwing a tantrum. (Laughs)

♥I absolutely hate FIGHTS♥

Fights are a normal part of any kind of relationship. It is impossible to have a bond, without it. But, I fear fights. (Something I truly want to work on) It gives me jitters. I don't want to see 'the person' scolding or yelling at me. I don't want to do it either.

♥I am not over my issues♥

I might not be getting as triggered at things as I used to be (thank you to the support system I had/have). However, I acknowledge there are many areas for improvement that needs my attention and patience. Including childhood trauma, fear of having kids or not wanting kids, fear of commitment, the issue with fights, anxiety attacks, codependency. (Those who try their luck on me all the time over a picture of me, look at all this before starting anything next time 😂❌)

♥ I will love you and want you all the time ♥

I am not a 'casual' relationship kind of a person. I get emotional over stuff. I won't and don't get bored of you (romantic interest) until and unless we are going down and I am thinking about breaking it up (which you'll know).

I will always be interested in you. I will send you poems, songs and writeups. I will check on you all the time. And as nice as all of this sounds in the beginning, it can get annoying. Hence, I might not be that exciting as I was in the beginning. I don't play hard to get. I accept if I have interest/love accordingly. If I am not accepting an offer, please understand I am NOT interested. You need not waste your energy, it'll never turn into a 'yes'.

♥Despite all, I am hopelessly romantic♥

I cringed too. But, the truths is, I am. Sadly.

I want to stop this. I understand there is no such thing as 'true' kind of love, like those in the stories I have read growing up but, only COMPATIBILITY (I don't even know the correct spelling, I used google to confirm it. Then how am I supposed to be that? LOL). But, the kid in me, never gives up. As much as I try, I will always be the 'forever kind of person'. I will always want that one proposal over 'A thousand years'. I will always want the 'OH!AW! THOSE TWO' kind of relationship, even if I can never have it.

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That is it, guys. I know these days, the blog is more about me than anything else. I am exploring certain aspects about myself and I hope this new way of writing my experiences isn't a bother to read. I got a bit of good feedback on the previous blog and hence, I used similar writing style. I have worked on the pictures as well. I hope the read is smooth and crisp ♥

Love

Luna

♪

#bekind

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